An actual e-mail I received today from Ashley Wiener, apparently a PR person for the SCORES strip club in NYC:

Sure, LeBron James is getting wooed by million-dollar offers from major corporations to make the move to NYC, but does money really talk the way Strippers walk? With the Knicks in talks to convert LeBron James into a New Yorker, offers are pouring in across the city from businesses which support this move, but the most recent offer may have just sealed the deal.

SCORES, the legendary NYC Gentlemen’s Club has announced today that they will offer James the following if he signs with the Knicks:

* A lifetime pass to receive free lap dances;
* A dedicated “LeBron James Day” where each girl will wear his jersey when stepping onto stage, in lieu of their robe;
* A lifetime pass for complimentary dinners at Robert’s Restaurant.

Well, guess that seals it ... LeBron's a Knick.